An Open Letter To The Man Who Left The Wife of His Youth

edmund_garrettDear John,

How are you? I hope you’re doing well. It has been seven years since our divorce. How time flies! It’s still so weird for me. Maybe you’re having the time of your life. Hopefully, you are happy. Because you told me you were not happy with me.

Are you happy now?

For me, happiness is fleeting. I prefer joy. I can be happy one minute, miserable the next. That’s emotion. (And you know how emotional I am.) Joy remains, no matter what. No matter what circumstance, I am always joyful. Why?

Because I am possessed!

Wait, it’s not what you think. I am possessed by Jesus Christ. He owns me. He’s the lover of my soul. He belongs to me. He is the only faithful One, my Divine Husband. And He will never let me go.

So I’m doing very well, John, if you care to know.

Do you have joy in your life now?

Are you truly a Christian? Did you pray to God while you contemplated leaving me? Did he say it was okay? Did he say he felt your pain? Did he agree with you on all your complaints against me? Were those things grounds for divorce, in God’s opinion?

Maybe he didn’t even hear you.

If I regard iniquity in my heart, The Lord will not hear (Psalm 66:18).

But your iniquities have separated you from your God; And your sins have hidden His face from you, So that He will not hear (Isaiah 59:2). Now we know that God does not hear sinners; but if anyone is a worshiper of God and does His will, He hears him (John 9:31).

So that’s why I ask. Also, I don’t know how you could possibly have confronted my Lord with your desire to divorce me. Because my Lord hates divorce.

Yet you say, “For what reason?”
Because the Lord has been witness
Between you and the wife of your youth,
With whom you have dealt treacherously;
Yet she is your companion
And your wife by covenant.
15 But did He not make them one,
Having a remnant of the Spirit?
And why one?
He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.

16 For the Lord God of Israel says
That He hates divorce,
For it covers one’s garment with violence,”
Says the Lord of hosts.
“Therefore take heed to your spirit,
That you do not deal treacherously.”   — Malachi 2:14-16

That describes the treachery of infidelity, according to God.

What is it with you men over 40, 50, over 60? Mid-life crises, end-of-life crises, need a new thrill? What elusive thing are you searching for?

What is it?

I’m just asking.

You need Jesus Christ.

If you had a problem with me or my behavior it was your duty to help me change. Even if I resisted belligerently. You’re the man. The godly man is the spiritual leader of his wife. He admonishes her. He protects and provides. Well, he’s supposed to, according to God. If Jesus is your Lord and Savior, He shows you the way. He helps you love and lead. But I’m not sure we serve the same God.

Because I don’t understand how a man could leave a wife who shares a history with him, and children.  I can’t fathom how a man who raised a family, went to church for years, listened to preaching, read a Bible, can decide at 40, 50 or 60, that the grass is greener somewhere else. It is baffling.

Yet men like you think it’s okay, John.

A recent post here on DRR talked about the indescribable love of God. To love someone is much like the process of discovering God — knowing God. The more we know about Him, the more we are able to love Him. Knowing is directly related to loving. You can’t love someone without knowing enough about them. John, did you truly know me? Did you truly love me?

Wait. I know the answer. You will say, yes, I did love you. But I say you never did. Because I don’t believe you know the author of love, the essence of love which is God. 1 John 4:8 says:

He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.

Jesus also said, If you love Me, keep My commandments (John 14:15). And He said he hates divorce.

He hates it because it misrepresents Him. God is  FAITHFUL. God is LOVE. God is TRUTH. God is JUST. God is RIGHTEOUS.

As a witness for Christ, the husband should also be faithful, loving, true and righteous in Christ.

God created marriage to be a display of His love toward us. Real love doesn’t die. Not if it’s the kind of love we acquire from God above. Supernatural love. He gives us this kind of love so that we can love our spouses unconditionally.

What’s with this middle age divorce madness?

I often think about you (not in that way) and other men who have left their wives in middle age. I’ve heard so many heartbreaking accounts. The women I’ve talked to are Christian women. Their husbands did not have any Biblical reason for leaving their wives. In fact, it was the other way around.

Yet, what is so encouraging to me are stories of enduring faithfulness in marriages where insicknessand healthone partner becomes severely ill, incapacitated, or doesn’t even recognize his/her spouse. Imagine. Imagine a husband saying, she doesn’t even remember my name. She can’t talk to me. She can’t even move. Still, I love her so. I will care for her until the day I die.

Til death do they part. Really.

That is sacrificial, selfless love. Like Christ on the cross, who freely gave himself, for his sheep. Are you one of His sheep? Ponder that this Easter season.

I see you have remarried. That’s why I wanted to bring these things to your attention.

Be happy. Better yet, be joyful.

Love,

The Wife of Your Youth

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Taste and See: The Indescribably Delicious Love of God

Once upon a time TV commercials claimed a certain candy bar to be indescribably delicious.  This commercial has to be the most mouth-watering, appetizing, enticing one I’ve ever seen:

This is the LOVE month. Hearts. Candy. Chocolate. Love. JOY.

But this world knows nothing of true LOVE or JOY. Granted, the Almond Joy brings a momentary party to your taste buds. Yum.

Real love and joy comes from God. The Bible says God IS love. His love toward us as believers is indescribable. Much more indescribable than the deliciousness of this candy bar, which, by the way, won’t be as beneficial to you as the nourishment of God’s Word. Indeed, it is one of the healthier temptations out there, due to the coconut. However, I’m sure the Almond Joy and Mounds bars have been altered with fillers and toxins since that 1961 commercial. But I digress…we won’t go into that.

Let’s get back to eating delicious things.

I love how God uses our senses metaphorically. Jesus is the Bread of Life:

And Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger, and he who believes in Me shall never thirst. — John 6:35

O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him. – Psalm 34:8

These and many other Bible verses talk about feeding your soul. Spiritual nourishment. This is real deliciousness. Jesus satisfies our deep soul longings. We will never hunger or thirst when we believe in Him.

The Indescribable Love of God

The love of God is difficult to understand. How can the Creator of the universe, the all wise, holy and pure God who dwells in light unapproachable, desire to bring into loving relationship such impure and hateful rebels like US?

My husband and I saw an excellent Christian movie that tackles the complexity of God’s love toward us. The movie Indescribable tells the true story of a hymn written by Frederick M. Lehman in 1917 called The Love of God. Pastor Lehman tries to describe the love of God and has difficulty completing the verses. His son, Blynn, sets out to help his father finish writing this hymn. God reveals himself to Blynn through adverse circumstances. (Yes, have tissues on hand.) Blynn comes to know God’s love even as he struggles to understand it in this sweet, humble, and refreshing production. A fascinating part of the hymn’s history is that the third stanza is a poem composed by an eleventh century Jewish rabbi.  The Love of God is a favorite of many and is still sung today.

Evangelicals lacking discernment will soon be flocking like blind sheeple to see the movie version of the blasphemous novel, The Shack. (Please click this link for a review of the book, The Shack, by Albert Mohler.)

I implore all believers to steer clear of The Shack. Instead, learn the history of a classic hymn in Indescribable. You’ll also learn about true love, true joy and the indescribable love of God.

God is love. – 1 John 4:8

Just for fun: History buffs, here’s the history of Hershey’s Almond Joy and Mounds, which by the way, are still said to be indescribably delicious.